Tag Archives forsatire

A Eulogy

Computer Eulogy

Despite no person out there, save for a few friends, knew my computer personally, many of you have indirectly come in contact with him and I’m sure many more anonymous machines may have known him even more closely. He had a name, as required by Microsoft, but few knew it. His name was Hesse.Hesse was […]

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Bank of America’s New Customer Reward Plan

Due to customer backlash, Bank of America is dropping their $5 monthly debit card fee. Someone high in the organization is reported as saying, “This sucks. Instead of making twelve billion from fees alone we’re now only going to make six billion. I just don’t know how we’re going to keep going. We’ve always depended […]

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Job’s Legacy Continues Post Mortem

In Steve Job’s new authorized biography, he’s quoted saying, “I will spend my last dying breath if I need to, and I will spend every penny of Apple’s $40 billion in the bank, to right this wrong. I’m going to destroy Android, because it’s a stolen product.” This is in reference to his belief that […]

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